It's Purim!

Tonight, March 9th, Purim begins--it's a joyous, fun holiday, with a carnival atmosphere. Two of my grandchildren, Avigail and Joseph, will be dressed as Alice in Wonderland and the Cheshire cat, and they will of course be adorable!
Purim celebrates the deliverance of the Jews from a massacre. The beautiful Jewish heroine Queen Esther, the King's favorite (he did not know she was Jewish) persuaded him to save her people. The villain Haman who had planned the massacre was hanged.
To celebrate Purim, which usually falls in March, one month before Passover, Jews read aloud the book of Esther. It is customary, and lots of fun, to boo, hiss, and use noisemakers to blot out the name of Haman whenever it occurs in the reading. Children dress up for Purim parties and parades, adults are commanded to get drunk, and friends give each other gift baskets. Happy Purim!

FAQ: What's a Mezuzah?

Question: I noticed that my Jewish boyfriend's parents have a little metal thing attached on the diagonal at the entrance door to their apartment. What is that?
Toni from Chicago

Answer: Toni, that's a mezuzah. You'll see on attached to the right side (as you enter) doorpost of most Jewish homes. It is placed there in accordance with the commandment in Deuteronomy to inscribe the words of the Shema, the most important Jewish prayer, which begins "Hear O Israel, the Lord is our God, the Lord is one....," "on the doorposts of your houses."
The little case may be made of metal, wood, clay--any material, really. The important part is the parchment scroll on which the prayer has been handwritten by a specially trained scribe (sofer).
The Mezuzah is placed slantwise because one famous medieval rabbi wanted it placed vertically, while another preferred horizontally, so a compromise was decided upon! Another interpretation says that pointing the top towards the interior symbolizes that God and his commandments are entering the home.
Often you will see Jews touch the mezuzah and then kiss their fingers, just as they do when they touch the Torah scroll in synagogue. They do this to remind themselves of their love of God and His mitzvoh (commandments).
I think it's nifty that the Chabad Lubavitcher sect of Judaism calls the Mezuzah "the Jewish security system."

Should You Convert?

Should you convert? I didn't.

When Fred and I married, neither he nor his parents put any pressure on me to convert. I'm sure it would have made them happy, but I didn't want to hurt my parents, who were devout Methodists. Besides, my personal history as a Methodist Youth camper, a choir singer, and an angel in the Christmas pageant (big step up from the chenille bathrobe clad shepherd of the first few years), was part of my identity, even though I had parted ways with religion and become an agnostic.

Now, years later, through osmosis, I feel very close to the Jewish people, Jewish culture, and Jewish causes. I realize that I was at fault for failing to contribute much to my boys' Jewish education. I couldn't, because I was ignorant. Well, I did put on a nice Passover seder and--like Caroline Kennedy--made good matzoh balls, but I didn't make enough of an effort to learn about Judaism. (Hence, www.Shiksapedia.com!)

My friend Larry Epstein, a fine author of many books and articles, most of which are on Jewish subjects, referred me to material on conversion he has contributed which is available on Conversion to Judaism Home Page . Larry became interested in conversion when he heard that converts are sometimes viewed as second class citizens. This wonderful site has useful articles on the conversion process, how to tell people about your conversion, real stories on converts, and many other topics.

In future postings I am hoping to feature stories of women who have converted. Please leave a comment if you have an idea or a story to share. Thanks!

The Wedding Ceremony: Religious or Civil?

Fred and I were married in the Bronx County Courthouse 43 years ago. The building was in ruins, and urchins sat on the steps. Inside, my mother wept (and not from joy) when she saw the signs saying "Don't spit on the floor" in English and Spanish. We settled upon this wretched venue for two reasons: 1. Fred's parents had been married there, and they had had a very happy marriage, and 2. (this is pure speculation on my part) my parents were embarrassed to have an interfaith wedding in my small Missouri town. Anyway, the wedding was hardly any girl's fantasy, but the marriage has worked!

Follow this link for a helpful discussion of whether or not to have a religious ceremony. Nina Calloway of About.com advises on the pros and cons of religious, interfaith, and secular weddings.

Dreidel, Dreidel, Dreidel

I'm excited to see my four-year-old granddaughter, the lovely Princess Avigail, this Hanukkah. She knows Hebrew--alas, I don't. So I am studying up on how to play the dreidel game. As I understand it, we'll take turns spinning the four-sided top--the dreidel-- and depending which Hebrew letter comes up (see the chart above) we'll gain or lose our tokens-- money, or M&M's, or raisins. The person who is left with no tokens is out of the game.

The Hebrew letters on the dreidel stand for the words translated as "A great miracle happened there," which refers to the two thousand year old legend of the one jug of oil which would normally have been enough to light the menorah for only one day, but which miraculously lasted eight days during the purifying of the temple in the time of the Maccabees.

My friend Ted sent me this wonderful You-tube video of a cowboy version of the dreidel song--you gotta go there now!

Before You Get Serious, Dear Shiksa, Read This:

A helpful site, Judaism 101, has a fine article, "Jewish Attitudes Towards Non-Jews," that should be required reading for all shiksas who are getting serious in relationships with Jewish men.

Chai=Life=18

Many thanks to Cassandra, who helpfully sent this comment on my "What's a Bar Mitzvah?" posting:

"I just thought I would mention that when we give money, my husband and I always give denominations of 18 (chai). Usually $180, but could be less or more depending on our relationship. Perhaps you can write a future post on chai, since aside from the number the word/idea comes up in many contexts (toasts, jewelry, Fiddler on the Roof...)."

I have heard of this custom of giving in multiples of 18, but never really understood it until Cassandra called it to my attention. I've learned that the symbol chai, pictured above, consists of two Hebrew letters which together spell "living," and are interpreted by some as referring to the living G-d, and by most as simply to life itself. In the system of gematria, in which numerical values are attributed to letters of the alphabet, the sum of the word chai is 18.

Cassandra knows so much about Judaism that I, like many of her readers, assumed that she is Jewish, but she is a shiksa (like us!). Her excellent web site, which is called "Baby Smiling in the Back Seat...or that's the goal anyway," is devoted to the subject of infertility, but one of her postings is especially interesting to us shiksas, as she talks about her experience of marrying into her husband's "fairly observant" family.